The best part of being in recovery is that there are so many options don’t be afraid to try things that you have never done meet some new people that can help you to start making positive changes
The only thing I’m changing is everything. The best way for me not to go back to using, is to build a new life where it’s easier not to use then to go back to the hell that I’ve come from. Making daily meetings, haveing a sponsor that I can trust an confide in.
Also finding a awesome group of men and women that I can closely relate to so i can share my burden. Recovery should not be a lonely process after all my addiction was a very lonely existence. So now in my new life in Recovery I strive for connection to other like-minded individuals that are truly working on themselves. so that we may grow together after all this is a we program.
Good job, Eli! Huge steps are not easy, but the necessary steps are always the biggest to take. As you move forward, the old ways and thinking dissipate and maneuvering through life gets easier.
My name isKenny. I’m in recovery in Ohio. I live with my beautiful wife and family. I’m lucky. LUCKY! I am a heroin addict. I want to HELP. OTHER addicts, myself, my family. I love the name of your foundation. I’m a technology idiot and not real good at this type of communication. I’m reaching out because I want to and I feel I need to. I would love to talk with anyone in this foundation that could give me some direction. I’m very passionate about staying sober today and helping others like me. Would like to know the next step ,if any advice from any of you from this real foundation, this seems to be a real group of fucking good people could give me. Thank you.
All we can do is keep trying. I am now 43 years old, a heroin addict in recovery but also a chronic relapsed. I first started using at 19, 24 years ago now. I managed to stop using at 22 and had almost 15 years without heroin and relapsed and have been using for the better part of the last 7 years. I feel for everyone with this thing, we all know the struggle. I had a professional white collar career, am educated and all of that…but always lurking in the background was that gutter punk junkie and it came back to the surface and took over my life one more. I am in treatment now and currently on sub maintenance, as a chronic relapsed. I know and fully understand the underlying reasons that I started using and still use, and until I can deal with those properly a lasting sobriety is going to be very difficult. Isolation and lonliness are a bitch, and only aggravated by all of the bullshit, hustling and lies that makeup a junkie lifestyle and lead to that shame that makes you further isolate from your people…those that will stick by you through all of your bullshit, anyway. I never expected to be here, almost 44 years old and covered in all of the scars of a life of addiction. Fuck heroin, for real. At least my girl got away from it, and consequently away from me, but that is for the better. It gives me something additional to strive for and the purpose I often feel lacking. Keep on fighting
Started using heroin at age 11 forward to 22 years of hell and I get on suboxone n have spent the last 10 years hooked on that , can’t get off . Feel I will be on it for the rest of my self . So yeah I’m not shooting up or doing anything illegal but I’m still dependant n at risk of relapse at any time cause if the suboxone for whatever reason is gone I’ll be going through withdrawal . I’m 34 yrs old with 2 kids , just trying to survive
Renee Gill…im going threw same feelings with methadone
Sat makes 8 years iv been at clinic…have not failed a drug screen since 2010 but i know im dependant upon this medicine but scared shitless to come off…iv earned every take home possible, go to my one on ones, my call backs n i stay clean but now batteling with this feeling of am i really considered “clean” n how do i kno im ready to get off this.
I feel u, praying for u
What amazing stories… For those using MAT, please know that with the right guidance from a physician, a slow taper is possible – as these are intended and not meant for long term use. It has become a trap for many. Then finding a doctor to help with a taper correctly proves to be a difficult task when one desires to do so. Many also attempt to taper too quickly which can cause a relapse in itself.
Finding the will and ability to utilize life saving medications is a must for those willing. Harm reduction works and many are proof of this. But sadly, society is full of its own judgment and division which hurts those living, breathing and grateful. It has been the cause of too many lives lost.
It is your life, your battle, your recovery. No one knows what you’ve experienced between then and now, nor can a person adamantly tell you you’re wrong for surviving.
Just know this: There are those who understand and do not judge. Keep these kinds of people in your circle. Forward steps are progress, big, small, and in between.
hi im maryjane and i am addicted to heroin, due to an attempt to keep someone in my life this was a big problem between us before i started using and so i figured basically if you cant beat em join them because i know they are never going to give her up, and it was the biggest mistake of my life, i cant afford my habit and have to support my friends habit as well, i cant take it anymore the toll it takes on my life and mental state and my wallets state…..i have no money anymore i lost my job and my family helps as much as they can but they really cant do much but i still appreciate it, i cant tell anyone in my family whats going on with me they would like disown me and i wouldnt have all i have now, they would take what i do have now which is alll i have and i cant live without them /it and i would lose my car and when i was homeless a few years back without a drug problem just cuz i was homeless i was living in my car with someone else and my cat..but if they find out there goes my place to live and my car which is my back up place to live and they would definately not give me cash in hand ever again if they knew what i was doing with what they do give me and yeah…sorry for rambling on…..and i hardly have any friends ..anymore…maybe 2 and we dont even talk or see eachother that often at all it sucks feeling to alone, unwanted and a failure. /worthless/// which is a trigger to my depression and i get all emo haha which isnt reallyfunny butthe word in general….but anyways i really want and need to get off this drug. ..but i can not go to a rehab or treatment . i can not leave my home area and i can not let anyone know what is going on..but something needs to be done i cant take the withdrawls im a lil biiotch about it i cant take it even just the lil starter symptoms, agitation, anxiousness, hot and cold swearts and pains, i already have chronic pain ..screws and a metal plate in my ankle which killllls me even more when i dont have anything.. THE THING IS I DONT DO IT TO GET HIGH. I AM STRICTLY DOING IT TO MAINTAIN NO PAIN….IM NOT taking excessive amounts i take a dose of what i need to not be sick and wait as long as i can take it before i take or need more, i dont want to be reliant on this shit anymore its been almost three years i wish i never ever ever touched this crap, im so dissapointed in myself…..im trying to do less and less but its hard i dont do alot i dont even do enough to close ,my eyes or not even like nod off or anythning/….but i want out of this addiction, i need help to hopefully detox at home painlessly as possible and i know i will promise myself i will never touch this shit again and have to feel like dying like i do when i withdraw ever the hell again, i want to be able to wake up and not have to be hurting or strung out or having to go look for money and get money and go like 20 mins away to go get the stupid shit and get up the gas for the car to get there to get better im not trying to get high, im trying to not hurt. i cant take the hurting i cant i need to find a way to get off this shit and not get withdrawl ever ever ever again i cant wait to wake up and be fine and not be stuck in this area because i cant leave for vacation or travel or anything because if im far away from where the stuff is i’m screwed and i will not risk traveling with all that stuff on me. i know i can stay away from this devil drug for good if i can get off it by myself at home with out anyone knowing about it and hopefully with the less pain and discomfort and anxiety as possible i really cant take it and thats why i end up just getting more and making bad decisions to get more so i don’t hurt ..is there anyone who has any insight on this or advice please.
thanks for listening ,
Melvin Keil
October 11, 2018
The best part of being in recovery is that there are so many options don’t be afraid to try things that you have never done meet some new people that can help you to start making positive changes
Michelle Keil
October 11, 2018
Absolutely, building a support network is HUGE!
Eli Heckman
October 11, 2018
The only thing I’m changing is everything. The best way for me not to go back to using, is to build a new life where it’s easier not to use then to go back to the hell that I’ve come from. Making daily meetings, haveing a sponsor that I can trust an confide in.
Also finding a awesome group of men and women that I can closely relate to so i can share my burden. Recovery should not be a lonely process after all my addiction was a very lonely existence. So now in my new life in Recovery I strive for connection to other like-minded individuals that are truly working on themselves. so that we may grow together after all this is a we program.
Kristi Lynn
October 11, 2018
Good job, Eli! Huge steps are not easy, but the necessary steps are always the biggest to take. As you move forward, the old ways and thinking dissipate and maneuvering through life gets easier.
Kenny Irwin
November 8, 2018
My name isKenny. I’m in recovery in Ohio. I live with my beautiful wife and family. I’m lucky. LUCKY! I am a heroin addict. I want to HELP. OTHER addicts, myself, my family. I love the name of your foundation. I’m a technology idiot and not real good at this type of communication. I’m reaching out because I want to and I feel I need to. I would love to talk with anyone in this foundation that could give me some direction. I’m very passionate about staying sober today and helping others like me. Would like to know the next step ,if any advice from any of you from this real foundation, this seems to be a real group of fucking good people could give me. Thank you.
Randall P
November 9, 2018
All we can do is keep trying. I am now 43 years old, a heroin addict in recovery but also a chronic relapsed. I first started using at 19, 24 years ago now. I managed to stop using at 22 and had almost 15 years without heroin and relapsed and have been using for the better part of the last 7 years. I feel for everyone with this thing, we all know the struggle. I had a professional white collar career, am educated and all of that…but always lurking in the background was that gutter punk junkie and it came back to the surface and took over my life one more. I am in treatment now and currently on sub maintenance, as a chronic relapsed. I know and fully understand the underlying reasons that I started using and still use, and until I can deal with those properly a lasting sobriety is going to be very difficult. Isolation and lonliness are a bitch, and only aggravated by all of the bullshit, hustling and lies that makeup a junkie lifestyle and lead to that shame that makes you further isolate from your people…those that will stick by you through all of your bullshit, anyway. I never expected to be here, almost 44 years old and covered in all of the scars of a life of addiction. Fuck heroin, for real. At least my girl got away from it, and consequently away from me, but that is for the better. It gives me something additional to strive for and the purpose I often feel lacking. Keep on fighting
Randall P
November 9, 2018
Chronic relapser…damn phone
Renee Gill
November 11, 2018
Started using heroin at age 11 forward to 22 years of hell and I get on suboxone n have spent the last 10 years hooked on that , can’t get off . Feel I will be on it for the rest of my self . So yeah I’m not shooting up or doing anything illegal but I’m still dependant n at risk of relapse at any time cause if the suboxone for whatever reason is gone I’ll be going through withdrawal . I’m 34 yrs old with 2 kids , just trying to survive
Crystal Nobles
November 14, 2018
Renee Gill…im going threw same feelings with methadone
Sat makes 8 years iv been at clinic…have not failed a drug screen since 2010 but i know im dependant upon this medicine but scared shitless to come off…iv earned every take home possible, go to my one on ones, my call backs n i stay clean but now batteling with this feeling of am i really considered “clean” n how do i kno im ready to get off this.
I feel u, praying for u
Kristi Lynn
November 19, 2018
What amazing stories… For those using MAT, please know that with the right guidance from a physician, a slow taper is possible – as these are intended and not meant for long term use. It has become a trap for many. Then finding a doctor to help with a taper correctly proves to be a difficult task when one desires to do so. Many also attempt to taper too quickly which can cause a relapse in itself.
Finding the will and ability to utilize life saving medications is a must for those willing. Harm reduction works and many are proof of this. But sadly, society is full of its own judgment and division which hurts those living, breathing and grateful. It has been the cause of too many lives lost.
It is your life, your battle, your recovery. No one knows what you’ve experienced between then and now, nor can a person adamantly tell you you’re wrong for surviving.
Just know this: There are those who understand and do not judge. Keep these kinds of people in your circle. Forward steps are progress, big, small, and in between.
mary blunt
November 25, 2018
hi im maryjane and i am addicted to heroin, due to an attempt to keep someone in my life this was a big problem between us before i started using and so i figured basically if you cant beat em join them because i know they are never going to give her up, and it was the biggest mistake of my life, i cant afford my habit and have to support my friends habit as well, i cant take it anymore the toll it takes on my life and mental state and my wallets state…..i have no money anymore i lost my job and my family helps as much as they can but they really cant do much but i still appreciate it, i cant tell anyone in my family whats going on with me they would like disown me and i wouldnt have all i have now, they would take what i do have now which is alll i have and i cant live without them /it and i would lose my car and when i was homeless a few years back without a drug problem just cuz i was homeless i was living in my car with someone else and my cat..but if they find out there goes my place to live and my car which is my back up place to live and they would definately not give me cash in hand ever again if they knew what i was doing with what they do give me and yeah…sorry for rambling on…..and i hardly have any friends ..anymore…maybe 2 and we dont even talk or see eachother that often at all it sucks feeling to alone, unwanted and a failure. /worthless/// which is a trigger to my depression and i get all emo haha which isnt reallyfunny butthe word in general….but anyways i really want and need to get off this drug. ..but i can not go to a rehab or treatment . i can not leave my home area and i can not let anyone know what is going on..but something needs to be done i cant take the withdrawls im a lil biiotch about it i cant take it even just the lil starter symptoms, agitation, anxiousness, hot and cold swearts and pains, i already have chronic pain ..screws and a metal plate in my ankle which killllls me even more when i dont have anything.. THE THING IS I DONT DO IT TO GET HIGH. I AM STRICTLY DOING IT TO MAINTAIN NO PAIN….IM NOT taking excessive amounts i take a dose of what i need to not be sick and wait as long as i can take it before i take or need more, i dont want to be reliant on this shit anymore its been almost three years i wish i never ever ever touched this crap, im so dissapointed in myself…..im trying to do less and less but its hard i dont do alot i dont even do enough to close ,my eyes or not even like nod off or anythning/….but i want out of this addiction, i need help to hopefully detox at home painlessly as possible and i know i will promise myself i will never touch this shit again and have to feel like dying like i do when i withdraw ever the hell again, i want to be able to wake up and not have to be hurting or strung out or having to go look for money and get money and go like 20 mins away to go get the stupid shit and get up the gas for the car to get there to get better im not trying to get high, im trying to not hurt. i cant take the hurting i cant i need to find a way to get off this shit and not get withdrawl ever ever ever again i cant wait to wake up and be fine and not be stuck in this area because i cant leave for vacation or travel or anything because if im far away from where the stuff is i’m screwed and i will not risk traveling with all that stuff on me. i know i can stay away from this devil drug for good if i can get off it by myself at home with out anyone knowing about it and hopefully with the less pain and discomfort and anxiety as possible i really cant take it and thats why i end up just getting more and making bad decisions to get more so i don’t hurt ..is there anyone who has any insight on this or advice please.
thanks for listening ,
maryjane